Dealing with Authorities and Elderly People

Overview

  • Respect is important, but shown in a more equal and direct way.
  • Hierarchy is less visible in everyday interactions.
  • Older people are treated politely, but not with extreme formality.
  • It is acceptable to disagree with superiors – respectfully and calmly.
  • Use formal address („Sie“ and titles) in professional or unfamiliar settings.

1. General Attitudes toward Authority

In Germany, respect for authority matters – but it is expressed differently than in many Southeast Asian cultures.

  • Social hierarchy is flatter: Teachers, professors, or managers are usually approachable and expect honest, clear communication.
  • Obedience is not the main focus: Germans value responsibility and the ability to express your own view respectfully.
  • Asking questions and offering opinions is welcome – even in formal situations.

Example:
In a meeting, it is completely normal to say: „Ich sehe das etwas anders.“ (I see that a bit differently.) This shows engagement and independent thinking, not disrespect.

You can tell your own opinion to the Boss as well.

2. How to show Respect in Formal Situations and to Elderly People

Whether you are speaking with a boss, a professor, a doctor, or an older person – respect is shown through formal speech, calm behavior, and clear communication.

  • Use “Herr” (Mr.) or “Frau” (Ms./Mrs.) + last name.
  • Use “Sie” instead of “Du” unless the person invites you to switch.

** For more about “Sie” and “du,” see our article Forms of Adress.

In professional and educational settings:

  • You can speak directly and ask questions.
  • Teachers and professors expect you to take part in discussions.
  • It is polite to express your own opinion, as long as it is respectful.

When speaking with older people:

  • Use polite language and eye contact.
  • Offer help if needed – but always ask first (e.g., „Kann ich Ihnen helfen?“ – “May I help you?”). Offer a seat in public transport by asking as well (e.g. “Möchten Sie sich setzen?”-“Would you like to sit?”)
  • No bowing or special gestures are necessary – a friendly tone and attention are enough.
Offer a seat to elderly People.

3. Disagreeing with Someone in a Higher Position

Having a different opinion is normal and acceptable – even when speaking to a boss, a professor or an older person. As long as you remain calm and respectful, your input is welcome.

Examples:

  • „Ich bin mir nicht sicher, ob das so funktioniert.“ (I’m not sure if that works this way.)
  • „Darf ich etwas dazu sagen?“ (May I say something about that?)
  • „Ich bin anderer Meinung, weil…“ („I disagree, because…“)

This style is not considered rude – it shows confidence and critical thinking.

Summery

In Germany, respectful behavior is shown through politeness, clear communication, and reliability.
Titles and formal speech are important at first, but personal opinions are always welcome – as long as you express them calmly and honestly.

Next Post about Politeness in Germany:

Gifts and Invitations